Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Katie Jane's LiveJournal:

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Monday, February 12th, 2007
5:01 pm	Dream Journal Oops. Guess I've been majorly neglecting my dream journal (that I'm not keeping for Naomi anymore, but rather for reference). I don't know if it's because of all the cheese I'm consuming as part of this diet (sounds backward, but that's Atkins for ya!) but I've been recalling dreams almost every morning for the past week. Last night I dreamt that Donnie, a character out of one of my most beloved stories, took me to a school of special children. We were looking for a boy with telepathic and telekinetic abilities to take away with us so that Donnie might adopt him. Probably inspired by watching that Carpark North video fifty times in one night. Current Mood: relaxed Current Music: Young Knives (Comment on this)
Thursday, September 8th, 2005
11:17 pm	Dream Journal - Entry... er? What number am I up to? Okay, I thank you now, Naomi, for requesting that I keep this dream journal since it turns out I need one for Psychology. I might keep doing it anyway. It's interesting to look back on your old dreams. Anyway, I had a very long and detailed dream last night, but I can't remember all of it. What I do remember is that I was outside church. I was going on a trip with Catherine (I'm not sure where) my friend Ruth and Ruth's friend who had curly red hair. But before we went on this trip we all had to drink a big glass of sprite. While the others were drinking this sprite I was admiring my cape. Yes, I was wearing a red cape. Whilst I was admiring this cape, James (er, this guy. he has nice hair) frowned at me. "Nice cape," he mumbled as he walked by. I beamed. It was a very nice cape, considering I've never really had any desire for one. Anyway, whilst this had been going on the others had all drunk their sprite and were waiting for me. I looked down at my full glass. Then I chucked it over the car park of the church, narrowly missing a pale blue car. Then we all packed ourselves up into suitcases. The end. Current Mood: gloomy Current Music: Relient K (Comment on this)
Monday, August 29th, 2005
10:52 pm	Army Camp Dream Hi Naomi! I just got back from Leeds Festival yesterday and I am totally high. Not like from drugs, but from adrenaline! It's been the most awesome weekend ever, which might be some sort of explanation for this VERY kooky dream. I dreamt I had somehow ended up at army camp with my friend Sarah (who is a cadet). In the army camp you had to perform well in sports and other outdoor competitive activities to gain points. Points were exchanged for food. The dream is pretty vague, but I can remember that since I hate outdoor activities and don't believe in organised sports (good excuse to never do PE in high school) Sarah had to use some of her points on me. She kept smuggling bowls of cereal for me. Not a pleasant dream. Current Mood: high Current Music: Hot Hot Heat (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 13th, 2005
4:13 pm	Dream 13 Helloooooo Naomi! We get our results later this week so I’ll be able to tell you that I’ve kept the dream journal! Gosh, any money says you’ve completely forgotten. I’m surprised I haven’t! Anyway… Okay, last night’s dream was WAY scary. I did not like it at all. And as usual, it involves my favourite band of all time InMe! I dreamt that I was friends with Joe (the bassist) and Dave (the drop-dead gorgeous guitarist and lead singer) since childhood. Oh, and I had another friend who had long blonde hair and was very quiet. I didn’t catch her name at any point. My hair was bright red and I had little silver hoops braided into it. Weird, huh? Anyway, we persuaded Joe to have his portrait painted. Then when it was done we took it back to my room and hung it on the wall. I suggested that since Joe’s portrait had turned out so well maybe Dave should have his portrait painted too. After all, one day they would be famous (this was clearly in the days before InMe fame!). However, before Dave got his portrait painted, a fight broke out between Dave and Joe in the middle of a field of yellow flowers. Dave seemed to be losing as Joe burst his lip, but then he suddenly got the upper hand, pinning Joe to the ground and kneeing him in the groin (ouch!). Then Dave leaned over Joe and whispered in his ear that what he was about to do next would hurt him more than it would hurt Joe. Before I continue I’d like to point out that this was a DREAM. And I cannot control my twisted subconscious, okay? So don’t judge me by my BIZZARE dreams. Okay, so then Dave ripped open the back of Joe’s t-shirt and it turned out Joe had an immensely hairy back (ew!). Dave started to rip out handfuls of hair, mercilessly. Joe was yelling in agony. This is when myself and my fair-haired companion intervened, breaking them apart. We decided that since Joe and Dave were clearly agitated maybe we should go to the cinema. After taking our seats, Dave yawned widely before curling up into the fetal position and falling asleep with his head on my knee. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: Ok Go (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 6th, 2005
3:20 pm	Dream Journal - Entry 3 Ciao Naomi! I have finally had another dream! I have to be quick in writing this one down as I've gotta get ready to go out. So, here goes. I had a dream that the youth group I take part in running (it's called Two-Twenty and it usually happens on a Tuesday evening) was taking place on a Sunday morning before the actual church service. Everyone was rushing around trying to get the media and the room set up for Two-Twenty. I asked Catherine to set up the computer, but she kept talking to Karl (the guy who runs media for church) and ignoring me. When I tried to move the computer myself, Karl kept telling me I was doing everything wrong. I got angry and decided I wasn't going to bother setting up the media (which is mainly my job on a Tuesday) and helped some other people moving things. I had to move a table with a tall girl called Sarah. We had to carry it through the church sports hall where everyone was playing squash. Sarah yelled, "BLITZ IT!" And we ran through a hail of squash balls, still carrying a table. When I dared to look up I saw the boy I have a mega crush on watching me running with this table. When we had safely delivered the table I stormed out of church deciding that I had had ENOUGH and I was going home. Hmm. I thought there was a lot of anger and humiliation in the dream. Plenty to look deeper into if you're a Freudian. Of course, I don't even know why you want me to keep this dream journal, Nomey! Au revoir! Current Mood: blah Current Music: Hanson (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 26th, 2005
1:07 pm	Dream about InMe Hello there Naomi! I am not much of a dreamer (as you can probably now tell) as this is only my second entry in my dream journal. It's not that interesting, but here we go. I had a dream that I was going to see two bands in one night (Reuben and InMe) with my friends Toni and Sarah. We went to the Reuben gig first that was in this tiny church hall. But as soon as we got in there I started to panic that we wouldn't make it across town in time for the InMe gig. So I persuaded Toni and Sarah to leave by offering them chocolate. Nothing unusual there. We made it to InMe that was in this dingy little club. The show was split into two parts and we watched the first part from a balcony. We were sat down, leaning over the railing of this balcony and I was taking tons of pictures of Dave (lead singer) because it felt like we were so close that I could just reach down and ruffle his hair. He kept looking up at me because the flash on my camera was really bright. Then there was an interval and I went outside for some fresh air. On my way out I bumped into Woodchuck (he is a real person, I call him Woodchuck because he played the Woodchuck in a performance of Hansel and Gretal ages ago!) who told me I better get back inside if I wanted to get a good place. He grabbed my arm and started to drag me back in. I tried to tell him my friends were waiting for me on the balcony, but he wouldn't listen. When we got back inside the club it had turned into a MASSIVE arena with thousands of seats and a huge stage in the center. I started to cry because I wouldn't be close to Dave anymore and Woodchuck tried to console me. Well, there it is. I don't think you can read too deeply into the meaning of this dream as I'm going to see InMe live in two days. Cya soon Naomi! Sweet dreams! Current Mood: excited Current Music: InMe - White Butterfly (Comment on this)
Friday, July 15th, 2005
11:46 pm	Dream Journal - Entry 1 Okay, Naomi wants me to keep this dream journal for her. She has not told me the reason, but I am a good friend who keeps promises. Strangely enough, I didn't think I'd have much to write, but I had a dream last night that I can quite vividly recall! Okay, I was in a marketplace with Phoebe from 'Friends'. Phoebe was telling me that her friend Caesar had called her and told her she could have a free black chair. We went to the stall that was selling inflatable black chairs, but Phoebe couldn't see Caesar. Phoebe explained the offer Caesar had made her to one of the chinese looking people working on the stall. But they wouldn't believe her and said that if she wanted a chair she would have to pay eight quid like everyone else. Then Caesar emerged! He looked exactly like 'Nick' out of 50 First Dates. He hugged Phoebe who then introduced me. Caesar shook my hand and smiled, widely, before ordering a worker to pack up a chair for Phoebe. Caesar made us dessert and then I woke up. Current Mood: disappointed Current Music: Skillet (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 21st, 2005
6:36 pm	Blamethrower I've been tired ALL today. I swear, both me and Zoe were falling asleep in History today. Or maybe that's just the horrendous boredom that ensues during History. A whole hour and a half in there on a Friday afternoon is just enough to kill me. Plus that now I got a B in my modular Paul expects me to CONTRIBUTE to his stupid class. As if, is my name Jonathan or something? We were talking about blogs in English class today. Reminded me that, oh yeah, I have one that I never update. The people who I like least in class were the ones that made fun of bloggers. Definitely NOT coincidential. But now I'm tired so I'm gonna do FLASH BULLETINS of what has been happening in my pathetic life. -A WEEK AGO I SAW REUBEN AT CAFE NIRVANA. STEPHEN DAVEY WAS THERE. IT WAS WAS WEIRD. - I'M SPEAKING AT TWO-TWENTY SMALL GROUP THIS SUNDAY - I DON'T LIKE ALEX OR JONATHAN ANY MORE - INME ARE RELEASING THEIR NEW ALBUM 4 DAYS AFTER MY 17TH BIRTHDAY - I GOT OKAY MODULAR RESULTS. Think that's all for now. Ciao! Pistola Current Mood: drained Current Music: The Killers (Comment on this)
Friday, February 4th, 2005
9:32 am	Censored So, what happens when you suddenly have more friends, but they're all at arms distance? And what do you do when those friends all go off and get closer to each other? What do you do when the person you used to tell everything to won't even sit next to you in the computer room anymore? What do you do when a guy likes you who you can't stand? What happens when the person you love with all your heart pulls away from you? What do I do? I don't want a boyfriend. Everyone else has one. I just feel sorta weird, like they're all in on this big secret. If I wanted a boyfriend I could go out and get one. I'd hate myself for needing someone to depend on, but I'd be in on the secret. Wouldn't I? Do these boyfriends even make my friends happy? Was Catherine happy when Andy broke her heart? Was Toni happy when she thought she didn't like Kyle? And am I supposed to pretend to like these guys? Even when I know they hate me because I'm onto them. Catherine hates me because I won't join everyone in celebrating her and Andy getting back together. You know why I won't celebrate? Cos what if he hurts her again? And what if he doesn't? How will I look then? I'm messed up and Toni's just made me not wanna go to stupid coram deo. I hate all of this so much. I hate being the bitter, resentful bitch in the corner. I hate having to hide who I am and how I feel so people won't get uncomfortable. Just re-read that, it sounds like I'm secretly gay. I'm not. Usually in this situation I'd swear, but now I can't even do that. I'm not resentful, just tired and sick of stuff. I should stop swearing, it makes me sound like a moronic chav. I don't want that. And Small Groups is going great, I'm becoming more comfortable with all the guys and feeling like I fit in more at 2-20, just typical that something (or someone) has to come and mess it all up. Maybe I should just stick to daydreaming about Zachary and shut the world out. That isn't a bad idea actually. For the rest of the weekend I am not going to say one more negative thing. Let's see if I can handle that sort of challenge. Doubtful. Pistola Current Mood: lonely Current Music: Savage Garden (Comment on this)
Thursday, January 13th, 2005
12:13 pm	Emotional Bulimic All my exams are finally finished. Psychology was Tuesday and I revised SO HARD for that exam. I think it was okay, but you can never really tell. I thought my RE GCSE had gone awful, but I still somehow scrimped an A. Yesterday was History. I had neglected History revision to revise psychology instead so I was pretty damn nervous. Still, it seemed to go okay too. I had my favourite acidic boy in at the same time doing his physics exam. That put me off a smidge. Today was General Studies. Nearly 3 hours spent in one cramped Maths room trying to wonder why I care what a Religious Fundamentalist is. Not fun. I'm not sure I even know why I need General Studies in the first place. They tell you it'll help you get into Uni, but I'm not sure if Uni is even what I want. Well, if my results are crap I'll know where I belong, I guess. Right now I'm trying to write a story to enter into a competition. I've decided to write a story about the realisation of growing up. I think I realised I wasn't a kid anymore when I went to get my second ear piercing. I think it's different for everyone, but it's a weird event that signifies growing up for everyone too. I really want to write a story about belonging. I've always been a freaky little kid. Like when all the other little girls were out playing with dolls and prams and shit, I was play F-Zero and Mario World with my brother and his friends. I know I'm not the only one. And even now I LOVE the retro games. Check this out: DK: You know, I didn't really have...I did actually have a 2600 as a kid and then I didn't really get much else. When I was in junior high and when Nintendo was first coming out, they were just really expensive. It was not like every kid could just go have Nintendo. It was a pretty f@#ckin' coolio thing you had to work up to, you know? So I wasn't that huge into it. But when I had the opportunity to get...like I just found this 2600 at a yard sale and bought it. And then it was actually in Portland, Oregon one summer we found an old hardware store where the guy just happened to have hundreds of old games. Like he knew there were all these collectors and stuff, so he had priced a lot of them out of our range. But the ones that were just the normal, non-collector games we got tons of. And then we just started finding more titles at garage sales and stuff. If you get some joysticks that actually work it's killer. Like Joust? Man, I am a Joust master. I can play Joust for days. See? Damien Kulash was a retro gamer. I can find other retro gamers! Maybe that's what my story should be about, finding where you belong? Not for the competition, obviously. Hmm, belonging. It's been on my mind a lot with Two-Twenty and Small Groups and stuff. Especially with Coram Deo coming up. Hmm, I guess it's time to write then. Pistola Current Mood: mellow Current Music: Silverchair (Comment on this)
Thursday, December 23rd, 2004
8:25 pm	My Vice and My Haven When I was about six years old I read every Dick King Smith book I could lay my hands on. By seven I moved onto Jacqueline Wilson, devouring her books like skittles. People had tried to buy me Enid Blyton and Roahl Dahl books, but I generally shoved them in a cupboard. In my eyes, Roahl Dahl wrote books to shock and disgust and Enid Blyton wrote books that were coated in sugar, with character names like Betsy and Harold. The stuff was not only an insult to literature, but an insult to the intelligence of children. By then I was already well into movies too. The first time I saw Harriet the Spy, I knew that all I wanted was to be a writer. I went through a period of wanting to be a spy too, but the writer ambition was not a phase. I have wanted to be a million different things throughout my life: a veterinary nurse, a child psychologist, a librarian, an office worker, even an actress for a very short time. But I have ALWAYS, ALWAYS wanted to write. I pretended I didn't want to anymore when I started High School because Toni's writing made mine feel inferior, but that was only because she had a more extended vocab than I did. Her imagination is sorely lacking compared to mine. Her stories are all based upon real life situations, which is okay, but what's the point of reading or even writing about things that happen every day? To me a story is an escape from everyday life. It's horrible really to say Toni's stories suck (cos that's basically what I just said, isn't it?), but that's only my opinion (or my inferiority complex rearing it's ugly head?). All of this sort of explains why last night during the peak of my devastation I wrote. Whatever my mood or emotion, I will write. Always. Current Mood: angry Current Music: InMe (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 8th, 2004
11:24 pm	A life of Dry Toast, Downloading and Church I'm in such a pathetically 'nothing' mood. I can't even pinpoint how I feel right now. How depressing is that? Still, I should be skipping. Liverpool are through to the next round of the Champion's League. I had a totally weird moment in the bathroom (I'll leave why I was in the bathroom during the match up to you imagination) it was 1-1 (obviously we needed two more goals to qualify)and I just believed and asked God. Within minutes we were winning 3-1. PRETTY amazing. Jake talked about 'Wrong Hungers' at Two Team on Sunday. Course, it sounds like a typical Christian message, DON'T HAVE SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE, DON'T TAKE DRUGS, DON'T BE NAUGHTY!!! It actually wasn't (course there was a mention of sex, but it's necessary ain't it?), it was all about how God understands how you have these things in your life and the only way to get rid of them is to 'starve the hunger'. It was totally relevent for me. 'Specially since I have a few myself. Due to my extreme lack of romance, my writing is corrupted. I can write nothing without an infusion of romance creeping in. It's extremely frustrating. I am yet to take the cure. I know of one of course. Mr Dry Piece of Toast, Jonathan Rogers himself, but a) he has a near perfect girlfriend and b) yeah right, like he's gonna look at me in that way. But my gosh is he perfect. Not that you care, but I'll give you some deets in the desperate hope that it will get him out of my head. He has silky blonde hair that reaches just past his ears and curls at the end. He is always playing with it. He wears glasses over deep penetrating eyes. His cheekbones are high and the lines of hisface are delicate yet also strong. His skin is flawless, I don't think he's ever had a zit. And to top it off he has the most amazing blood red, pouty lips. Adorable. Not only that, but he is a History freak (like I once was, alas) he takes Philosophy (duh, he's in my class), he's in a BAND and he is an aspiring writer. On paper he is completely perfect for me. Unfortunately, real life isn't like that. The problem with Jonathan, as well as his terrible music taste, is that he's boring. There's something about him. I mean he's not like dull to talk to, quite the contrary actually, he's fascinating. But he never laughs. I've never heard him just laugh properly. If there's something you should know about me it's that I can't handle people who don't laugh, since, if I'm honest, I'm kind of a funny chick in a dry sarcastic way. However, even though I know that Jonathan's lack of laughter makes him completely WRONG for me, that doesn't mean that I can just turn off my feelings (much as I'd LOVE to). It might also mean that I am destined to be alone as I can't seem to feel anything for anyone else either. Well, apart from Alex. Sort of. So, I've got two days off from college now (Everybody say 'Yeah!') so I'm going Christmas shopping tomorrow with my homies. Gonna get the pressies! I love buying Pressies for people, especially this year because I've planned out exactly what I'm getting everyone! I need to talk about yesterday. Hmm. I will then. So,i had my new InMe CD with me (thanks to Josh the little angel)and I'd been listening to 'Otherside' non stop all morning. In Philosophy we had to make posters. Our group got 'emulating your role model'. So Toni, Eleanor and I had the idea of going round college taking pictures of people and then deciding upon role models for them. For example, we took a picture of Beth who was working at a desk in the library and compared her to Shakespeare (at a desk!). It was so cool just walking around college and asking random people if we could take their picture. Most people were cool about it, but the dudes in the smoking shelter wouldn't allow it. Uptight freaks. Then in the evening it was our STEWPOD GCSE presentation evening. We turned up at the Town Hall, edging away from the people we hoped we migh never see again before being led into the most beautiful room I've ever seen. It reminded me of a church, a stained glass window at the front and high, arching walls that resemble delicate, stretching fingers. Now its 00:29 a.m an I should probably finish this tomorrow. Okay. Goodnight. Pistola Current Mood: drained Current Music: Kings of Convenience (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 1st, 2004
7:46 pm	Unique, just like everybody else I have so much to write down. I'm just unsure where to begin. OKAY! Monday is the best place to start I guess. So, Jen had told me the day before about the whole small group/mentoring thing and also told me to talk to Toni about it before I agreed. Well, I agreed to it without talking to Toni, so I thought I'd get the scoop from her on Monday at college... Only to find that she knew NOTHING about it!!! Oh my gosh! I knew something before Toni and Kyle! I'm like, so proud! Anyway, so we grab Jen and Becky C on Tuesday night (after the awesome Murder Mystery! I KNEW it was Thom, he's like so Ted Bundy! And Woody! MURDERER!!! Lol.) and Toni's all like can someone explain what is going on. And it turns out that I'm in the leadership and she's not. And it's totally un-Christian of me, but there's a teensy part of me that was all like 'HA! I made it and you didn't! Try and act like you're so much better than me now!' I know that is totally selfish and so immature, but I'm trying to be honest here. But it also means that I've opened my Big Fat Mouth and blabbed to Toni and Catherine about something that Jen wanted to keep under wraps. Ooops. So, onto today when I had like the funnest Psychology class EVER! It was so cool! We made the documentary (Saima was off, so I had to be the psychologist ((And wear Claire's glasses and a LAB COAT)) and Phil took over my part). We dressed up Ryan (who was playing the psycho kid) in a pink hat and put talc all over his face! Then he went with me to go get a lab coat! We were walking down the corridor and everyone was giving him weird looks! I could not stop giggling! We went up the steps to chemistry and the class were all grabbing their lab coats so EVERYONE saw Ryan as he asked the tutor if he could lend a lab coat! The tutor looked SO freaked out, until I told him what it was for! Scott Buckley saw us and he was all like 'is he on crack?' it was so cool! Ryan is insane! I should've guessed he knew Karl. I love my Psychology class. I just know I can always have a good time with them. I'll confess that I'm a mess boy-wise. I still like Jonathan (even though I can't spell his name) despite the fact that he is a total dry piece of toast AND has a girlfriend. I don't know about Jamie Rose, he's a jackass who just happens to have good pheromones. And Alex. Well, that's an insane notion. I smiled at him today. I don't think he knew who I was for a sec. He is SO cute in an 'I can't believe I like this guy' kinda way. I must be completely insane!! Yesterday Catherine gave me a notebook. It had a note on the first page from Catherine saying how thankful she was that I was her friend. I was the sweetest thing ever! She is such a darling. Really, she's just so dependable and understanding. I'm really glad we're friends now. On other notes, I'm worried about Sergio. She hasn't been at Two Twenty for weeks now and Gaz said that she's been grounded for smoking. I know that she's not okay. I really do need to text her this week. For now, my prayers are with her. Anyway. That's why I am happy. Pistola Current Mood: happy Current Music: Biffy Clyro (Comment on this)
Monday, November 29th, 2004
5:31 pm	Yeah, weekend from hell? Okay, so I've had a fantabulous weekend and a terrible weekend too. Very confusing. The Bad - So Sunday morning, I was supposed to be having breakfast with Jen. I'd been REALLY looking forward to it. But, of course, I couldn't get a stupid bus. I was REALLY angry and when I got to church it was like the last thing I felt like doing. As well as that, Sunday night rolled around and Toni got upset about her Dad. Suddenly Jen friggin Darbyshire is there, telling her not to cry and HOLDING HER HAND. Not to sound un-christian but, who the hell does that bitch think she is??? The Good - What Jen had wanted to talk about was that Jake is doing a new small group thing and Jen wants me to be part of the leadership within it. Coolie. BIG commitment, but way cool. And as well as that, WE BEAT ARSENAL!!! It was glorious! We scored in the first half, Xabi Alonso, but then Arsenal equalised in the second with a goal that Chris Kirkland SO should have saved. I thought we were gonna draw and it was so unfair since in the first half we shoulda had a penalty and that we'd been the better team all along. BUT THEN in the last minute of extra time NEIL MELLOR SOCRED! It was an absolutely beautiful goal! The look on Patrick Viera's face! FANTASTIC. Ah. Life is strange like that. Pistola Current Mood: creative Current Music: Was Bryan Adams (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 14th, 2004
10:27 pm	Uneventful Friday was weird. Access went kinda crazy even though it was only the two girls from the week before. They are really nice. They invited us to an all night worship at the Queen's hall this Friday. I'm thinking of going. Did the announcements. I'm way better than Kyle and Mark. Erm, not. After Access I got talking to Catherine while we were moving the room back. Suddenly all this stress just came gushing out of her and I knew she needed to talk. We sat down and discussed some stuff. Turns out Catherine has it a lot tougher than I'd of thought. I missed all of History, but it didn't matter. She had helped me on Wednesday, now she needed to say some stuff. So that was Friday. Saturday. We went shopping, Kirsty, Ange, Vicky, Toni and I. Was GREAT to see Kirst again. She's working at Tesco and doing horse shows. I think she loves having money. I discovered Kirsty is a very generous person. Vic disturbed a two minutes silence in the train station. WAY FUNNY! We did all the shops for Ange before hitting Subway. Mmm, Steak and Cheese subs. So then we went to Afflecks. Just for the record, I LOVE AFFLECKS PALACE, IT IS MY HEAVEN. Got tons of cool stuff, but once we'd got out Ange was kinda ill and she puked in the train station bogs. Poor thing. She had to go straight home when we got back to Hindley. Which is what I wish I'd done. We went back to Toni's house and chilled for a bit before Jen Darbyshire came. I didn't think I liked Jen, Saturday night confirmed it. I don't know if it's jealousy or the fact that she dissed Vic a lot or even that fact that she doesn't seem to ave any sense of humour. It's one or all of them because I CANNOT STAND HER. Maybe that's why today I didn't go to church or two team. Or it could have been the splitting headache. Anyway. There we are. My weekend. Pistola Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: Daniel Johns - THREE (and the Bob Mix) (Comment on this)
Thursday, November 11th, 2004
12:56 pm	Victorious I have finally finished my racism in football piece! It sucks, but that's the way life goes. My Hanson review is totally awesome, but I don't think she's gonna put it in. Darnit. She better else no racism in sport!!! Muwahahahahahahaha! I can bribe! Wait, is that bribery? Just checked my messages on quizilla. Makes me feel VERY loved. I've got tons of English to do tonight and then tons of Philosophy to do after that. Geez, that's MY weekend shot. Shopping on Saturday with Ange, Toni, Kirst and Vicky though. Should be lots of fun. I miss Kirsty tons, no one makes me laugh as much as she does. Got Philosophy on my own after dinner. Oh the joy of it all. I'm writing my second English piece as a story on Betrayal and Trust. It rocks cos I get to incorporate all the places I've seen and have thought are perfect for my next story. Well, apart from Amsterdam. Must go. Pistola Current Mood: productive Current Music: Auf Der Maur (Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 10th, 2004
11:59 am	Not Sorry I just blew up at Toni for saying I didn't come in one day because I hadn't done my Philosophy essay. She stormed off crying (as per usual) and I was left looking like a bitch (as per usual). I said sorry in philosophy but I am so NOT sorry. She IS a bitch and I AM sick of her insinuating all of this shit and looking down her nose at me. Geez, I swear she does it on purpose just so everyone will think I'm a bitch and she's poor little innocent Toni. Screw her, I really hate her right now. How dare she make me feel this way and then just criticise me non stop. If there's anything I hate it's pity. I don't want her pity and I hate it when she acts like she knows me. She doesn't know shit about me and its times like this I'm glad she'll be out of my life soon. Two Twenty wasn't that good last night. Just didn't wanna be there in the end. It was good to see Segio and Stella, but I just feel stifled when I'm there. Heather came with us. She seems so much happier. It's pathetic but when I mentioned Karl to her I'd been hoping she'd tell me he'd asked her about me. Maybe he did. I don't think so somehow, his mind obviously doesn't work like that. I didn't go into Wigan so I don't know if he was there. Sorta wish I had although I bet he wouldn't have been there. It was just a one off, a lucky day. Lucky me. That sort of luck is rare for me. I won't get my hopes up. I should go to History but I don't want to. Gotta get my articles done tonight. Yay for me! Anyway. There, my rantiing is done. Pistola Current Mood: cranky (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 7th, 2004
9:10 pm	HANSON!!! It was so amazing! I mean, the day started off badly, but I don't want to think about that. Okay, so we get to the train station and I'd been panicking thinking 'shit, there's not gonna be a train and then I'm gonna look like an idiot'. There was a train though and while we were waiting for it we saw Krista! How weird is that? Anyway, I was confessing my secret longing for a box of sparklers when our train came. It was weird catching the train to the gig. It was cool cos everyone was going somewhere and it just felt like I was in this blur of travelling. I can't explain the feeling properly. But the train journey was cool. I love being in motion. I could sit all day on a train or a bus just listening to music and thinking. It's ultra relaxing. My parents say I used to love being in the pram when I was little. I think it's the whole motion thing. Anyway, so we arrived in Manchester and weren't really sure where to go. We tried a couple of roads before we got the right one, but it was cool because the city is so awesome at night and we saw so many people just happy and content in the restaurants and in this gym we passed. It was like walking along roads lined wih screens each showing different people's lives. Like being a total onlooker. We stopped in Subway and just sat, eating, feeling so still. It was pitch black and damp outside and just sitting and feeling so free. It sounds so airy fairy, but it's just how last night felt. We carried onto the gig and got talking to this girl while we were queueing. It was amazing to see the diversity of the crowd. Everyone seemed excited, even the people who'd been dragged along. We got in and went straight up to the venue. Talked to a couple beside us who'd come from Wales to see them. They were really nice. The support act were okay. This woman called Sandra. She was real open with the crowd and her voice was seriously smooth, but she wasn't particularly memorable. The feeling before Hanson came on stage was VERY memorable. They all look real different, even than the picture on the back of underneath. Isaac was looking REALLY HOT, with his short hair all curly. Zac's hair is very much like Will Fisher's, but longer and blonder (obviously!), he's also the most built of the guys. Not chubby, but built. Taylor's hair is long enough to be tied back and he's got this whole Daniel Johns goatee going on. Good job it isn't Taylor I like. They were amazing to say the least. They did a cover of 'Ain't No Sunshine' which blew me away. Ike did a solo called 'Being me' which was beautiful. He was really good with the crowd too. Taylor's solo was 'Crazy Beautiful' during which he showed of his pianistic talents, it was awesome. Zac's solo was good too, but his voice just isn't as strong as his brothers. They did play Mmmbop, but it wasn't at the end of the set and it definately wasn't extended, just slipped in there, casually. I respect them for that, proves that the song doesn't define their music. A few songs I can remember them playing: 'This Time Around' (where they split the crowd, SO COOL!), 'Where's The Love', 'With You In My Dreams', 'You'll Never Know', 'Runaway', 'If Only', 'Penny and Me', 'Hey', 'Underneath'... I'm sure there were more, but I just can't remember them. They didn't play 'Hand in Hand' (*sob*), but I'll get over it. All together, it was an awesome night. Which is more than I can say for tonight. Don't wanna talk about it cos I'll only get angry. Josh's eighteen today. He said something really lovely on the phone. I don't need to write it down cos it will always stay with me. IKE FOREVER 6/11/04 Pistola Current Mood: okay Current Music: Linkin Park (I was desperate for some angry music!) (Comment on this)
Saturday, November 6th, 2004
12:48 am	Trust in God, he knows, after all. Today was a really good day. I didn't think it would be but it so was. As promised, Toni has STOPPED telling us everything about Kyle and is being much more interesting like she used to be. Like her old self. I've really missed her. She's getting baptised on the 5th December. I might just cry. Access brought in four people. BUT it was actually really uplifting because they were really cool esp one girl called Krista. And I saw Ryan while I was chocolating outside and he was really nice about it. I'm still scared of seeing Zoe or Alison while I'm out there but this is what it's all about, giving everything up for God. I never thought it would be easy, but sometimes it strings hard. Been listening to some Joyce Meyer and her word made me feel better about this whole church elite issue I had going on. Dunno why I was so bummed out about it all. She talks about how people will go to such extents to get in with certain people at church. I felt like she was speaking to me and it just made me realise that I don't want to be in the church elite because that's not where God wants me to be. It's easier to feel better about it when you know someone else has been through it. Still Access was really good and Catherine looked really happy afterwards. I've been worried about her, especially today, but it all went fine. Thanks to God, of course. Tomorrow is Hanson and I am SO excited. I know it's sad to say that, but I don't care. I think it's gonna be a really great night and I can't wait to go into college on Tuesday wearing a Hanson t-shirt. SO cool! I wanna be near the front since it's academy two and you can get close. Must feel weird to them since they've played like the MEN in Manchester but I think it's better to be respected than followed by a bunch of mindless girls who don't follow for music but looks. We did our presentation in Philosophy yesterday and it went really well. Toni and Me had written this mini play about an argument over Utilitarianism. At the end of lesson Jonathon asked us if we were drama students and we were all 'no' and then Toni went, sarcastically, 'we should be, shouldn't we?' and he goes, real enthusiastically, 'you should.' I know he's a dry piece of toast and he has a girlfriend but he's really nice and really cute. I guess it's easier to like someone when you know that its NEVER gonna happen. Josh turns eighteen on Sunday. SO weird. I mean, I've known him since he was thirteen. Its just strange to see him grow up. But he's so different to everyone else I know. He has all this knowledge and culture within him, yet he doesn't flaunt it. I mean, the people at college are constantly referring to 1984 like it's the only book ever written. Josh has read it, but he just isn't like them. I dunno, it's hard to explain. It's like he can read moods and he knows when you wanna talk about college and music, or when you wanna talk about life and feelings. It makes talking to him so easy and there are nights when I just long for him. But it can never be. Well. That's enough for now. I'll be sure to write all about Hanson!!! Pistola Current Mood: hopeful Current Music: Greenday, Rammstein, Weezer, HIM, Muse, Lost Prophets (Comment on this)
Thursday, November 4th, 2004
12:00 pm	Access my bad mood I am incredibly annoyed. All I wanted was to chill out, get my piece on racism done and listen to some music. None of this is done and I am here, rattling off random rants and aliterating WAY too much. I'm tired and my hair is awful. Still, Liverpool won last night and I had a really good talk with Toni. I'm dreading access tomorrow (that's a double 'c'). Have to do a game. Thom Beale told me. Still don't even know what it is but it means I don't have to stand outside YAY! It is TOTAL humiliation. Not half, TOTAL. It really upset Catherine a couple o' weeks ago. She can't understand why people won't take her seriously. It'll take time, but I still HATE access. Only a couple of days till Hanson and then even fewer days till shopping. I am a happy girl in that aspect of life. Didn't go to to Two Twenty AGAIN on Tuesday. I collapsed on the couch and just couldn't move. Bad. Saw Karl Forrester on Momday when I was chilling on my free afternoon. Couldn't get him outta my head for the rest of the day. Now that is scary. KARL! Yeah, monobrow Karl. Wacky, looks like a pixie Karl. Ties pink bows in his hair Ka- I think you get the picture? There is something seriously wrong with me. I need a new project since dry piece of toast certainly isn't working out and there just doesn't seem to be anyone else. Mark was a total bust (I'm over it) and Stephen fizzled out. Josh is an angel but we're just too far apart and Karl, I don't need to explain why that wouldn't work. I'm done for. Maybe I'll just stick to daydreams about Dave MacPherson. Kat Current Mood: working Current Music: None! MY DAMN BATTERIES ARE FRIED! (Comment on this)